Practicing Awareness of Microaggressions

            This week I focused on listening to conversations for microaggression.  To my surprise, I encountered a multitude of microaggressions.  I thought about keeping track of them and I realized there were too many and could not remember them all.  The biggest one that stood out in my mind involved gender microaggression.  Working closely with a group of women and just two men, one can imagine that they would hear several gender microaggressions.  This week I noticed microaggressions against the male gender.  Most of them comprised of stereotypes and how they would be lost without their wives.  One of the husbands was sick and it was said that men turn into big babies when they are sick.  The major hidden messages are that women are the superior gender and men need us for survival because they could not do it on their own.  During these conversations, I sat back and listened.  I admit in the past I had participated in the conversations when it was pertinent to my situation.  I am guilty of gender microaggressions, especially if I am frustrated with my husband.  During my reflections this week, I realized how we harbored these microaggressions and it affects the way we interact with our spouses.  I also realized how hurt they would probably be if they heard some of the things that are said.  I know when I hear gender microaggressions/stereotypes about women, I get upset especially when they are not true.  So I can now imagine and empathize with males when females do the same.  To either party it is not fair for things to be said especially when the party being mentioned is not there to defend their actions.  However, I do realize that men and women do need to vent their emotions from time to time.  During this time, we need to be mindful of what we say, who we say it to, and who could overhear it.  This is especially true when adults are talking in front of children who are listening and absorbing these microaggressions. 

            My observations opened my eyes this week.  In the past I would notice obvious discriminatory remarks.  However with the microaggression lens on, I noticed how in numerous conversations we say things unintentionally and/or unaware of the hidden messages we are conveying.  From time to time, I even caught myself about to say something.  I stopped myself because I realized what I was about to say.  My mother was right, “Think before you speak.”  I realized how these microaggressions could impact others and perpetuate stereotypes, prejudice, and discrimination on a group of people.  If we hope to start eliminating discrimination and celebrate diversity, we all need to be aware of microaggressions especially since they are usually unintentional.