This
week I focused on listening to conversations for microaggression. To my surprise, I encountered a
multitude of microaggressions. I
thought about keeping track of them and I realized there were too many and
could not remember them all. The
biggest one that stood out in my mind involved gender microaggression. Working closely with a group of women
and just two men, one can imagine that they would hear several gender microaggressions. This week I noticed microaggressions
against the male gender. Most of
them comprised of stereotypes and how they would be lost without their
wives. One of the husbands was
sick and it was said that men turn into big babies when they are sick. The major hidden messages are that
women are the superior gender and men need us for survival because they could
not do it on their own. During
these conversations, I sat back and listened. I admit in the past I had participated in the conversations
when it was pertinent to my situation.
I am guilty of gender microaggressions, especially if I am frustrated
with my husband. During my
reflections this week, I realized how we harbored these microaggressions and it
affects the way we interact with our spouses. I also realized how hurt they would probably be if they
heard some of the things that are said.
I know when I hear gender microaggressions/stereotypes about women, I
get upset especially when they are not true. So I can now imagine and empathize with males when females
do the same. To either party it is
not fair for things to be said especially when the party being mentioned is not
there to defend their actions.
However, I do realize that men and women do need to vent their emotions
from time to time. During this
time, we need to be mindful of what we say, who we say it to, and who could
overhear it. This is especially
true when adults are talking in front of children who are listening and
absorbing these microaggressions.
My
observations opened my eyes this week.
In the past I would notice obvious discriminatory remarks. However with the microaggression lens
on, I noticed how in numerous conversations we say things unintentionally and/or
unaware of the hidden messages we are conveying. From time to time, I even caught myself about to say
something. I stopped myself
because I realized what I was about to say. My mother was right, “Think before you speak.” I realized how these microaggressions
could impact others and perpetuate stereotypes, prejudice, and discrimination
on a group of people. If we hope
to start eliminating discrimination and celebrate diversity, we all need to be
aware of microaggressions especially since they are usually unintentional.